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- Finland
- Deviant for 20 years
- frost-spirit.livejournal.com
- She / Her
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My Bio
Writing, drawing, video games and learning languages -- those are my greatest passions in life.
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Blackmore's Night.
Favourite Games
There are many. Fire Emblem (especially Fates), Dragon Age II, Mass Effect 2, Don't Starve, ...
Favourite Gaming Platform
PS4.
Other Interests
Video games. Reading. Writing. Fanfiction. Languages and linguistics.
He... died?
0 min read
I... uh... :O_o:
My (ex-)stepmom just called. Apparently, my father died last week. It seems he had cancer, but he didn't try to contact me or my sister in his last months/weeks. I hope he at least had friends who were there for him in the end if he did not want us there.
I... don't know what to feel. I'm not particularly sad or shocked. I suppose it's because I'd already "killed off" my father in my mind years ago. I do feel a bit guilty that I don't feel sad, though.
At the same time, I'm relieved. I always had this nagging feeling telling me to get in touch with my dad, to try and repair our relationship, but now that it's too late mayb
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[Edit]
0 min read
Ugh. I wrote a journal entry yesterday, but apparently it broke some rules I agreed to follow elsewhere, so I'm deleting that journal text. I tried to keep the text entirely personal, but that's not enough because I might end up saying things that are in violation of the agreement I signed or something. I understand the reasoning, but it still annoys me that I can't talk about my own issues here. I can't even recap what I said in the original post except in the vaguest terms.
I wrote about problems I've been having and how terrible I've been feeling for days. I'm still not doing amazingly well, but I'm hanging in there. I was losing my faith
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No News is Good News
0 min read
It's been a looong time since I last showed my face around here. It's been an emotionally taxing time in my life, so I've been avoiding human contact since the end of November or thereabouts. I'm happy that so many of you have left me messages in my absence, though, so thank you for all of those! I'll try and get back to you in short order.
There's nothing much that has actually happened to me in the past several months. I've simply been too exhausted to deal with people, most of the time. Now more so than ever, because I have to deal with people almost daily: I'm attending a day hospital this spring. I've been battling all sorts of mental p
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Profile Comments 107
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I don't mean to bother you, but did you ever own or go on a website called Goldenfur?
Happy Birthday.
Thank you. 
Hello. It's been a long time since I've talked to you. I'm so sorry the last year has been insane. How are you?
Ahahaha, before I forget: I have not yet congratulated you on Finland being ice-hockey world champion. XD My Finnish teacher is CRAZY about this and she made us watch the goals on Youtube and talk about ice-hockey in Finnish (which my group failed as hell, because I was with bitchy young women all "I don't know a thing about ice-hockey! I will not talk about it!" even as the topic was NOT "Tell details about ice-hockey!" but "Why do you think ice-hockey is so important to the Finns?" <.<). XD XD XD Haha, she even introduced us to some remix somebody made of the commentator's reaction on an amazing goal against Russia, I laughed myself stupid. XD
xP
I know you're probably not into ice-hockey too much, I just wanted to tease you. My teacher is CRAZY. Plain crazy. She's the most fangirlish-about-her-country Finn I've ever met. I love her. XD XD XD
Anyway, I have to do annoying homework now and will probably write some FF at the same time. Just wanted to tell you the ice-hockey thingie about my teacher. XD Hope you're fine, I am to a certain point (at least right now). We've got nasty nasty greenflies on our poor strawberries and bought such a splendid pressure spray bottle and now I can flash them away with a water jet and DAMN - doing so raised my mood to a level I did not reach for days and weeks. MUAHAHAHA. It's so funny and the PERFECT release for anger and everything. Nasty little beasts, I gonna get them all flying. XD Really, it speaks to my most basic hunting instinct and it just feels SO GOOD. Though I wonder what the neighbours will think about me standing by the window spraying at the strawberries and growling "Die, die, little vermin! You won't eat my plants! I'll kill you all! MUAHAHAHAHA!" XD ... Did I just write a whole paragraph about killing greenflies? xD I hope I don't sound too crazy. XD It's just so satisfying and funny! xDDD
xP
I know you're probably not into ice-hockey too much, I just wanted to tease you. My teacher is CRAZY. Plain crazy. She's the most fangirlish-about-her-country Finn I've ever met. I love her. XD XD XD
Anyway, I have to do annoying homework now and will probably write some FF at the same time. Just wanted to tell you the ice-hockey thingie about my teacher. XD Hope you're fine, I am to a certain point (at least right now). We've got nasty nasty greenflies on our poor strawberries and bought such a splendid pressure spray bottle and now I can flash them away with a water jet and DAMN - doing so raised my mood to a level I did not reach for days and weeks. MUAHAHAHA. It's so funny and the PERFECT release for anger and everything. Nasty little beasts, I gonna get them all flying. XD Really, it speaks to my most basic hunting instinct and it just feels SO GOOD. Though I wonder what the neighbours will think about me standing by the window spraying at the strawberries and growling "Die, die, little vermin! You won't eat my plants! I'll kill you all! MUAHAHAHAHA!" XD ... Did I just write a whole paragraph about killing greenflies? xD I hope I don't sound too crazy. XD It's just so satisfying and funny! xDDD
Well, thanks, I guess? As if I have any right to take credit for the victory. XD; I didn't for a minute think Finland could actually win the game (come on, they've lost to Sweden countless times in the past years!). 
Shows how much I know.
O_o; wow. I assume you've also heard the "Ihanaa, Leijonat, ihanaa!" song that became popular after the last time Finland won the Championship? The commentator is legendary. It's going to be a real loss when he retires, I tell you.
...I'm... amazed at the topic of your discussion. It's so difficult. How long has this group of your been learning Finnish, anyway? How many people are there who even want to learn Finnish? O_o
Oh, I know how fun it can be to do something that is useful to plants but looks/sounds weird to onlookers. I once put a noose on a plant that grew like crazy. I didn't have sticks to support the stem, so I tied the noose so that the stem supported itself. I was quite happy with myself afterwards. XD Hope you continue to do (reasonably) well! ♥
Shows how much I know.O_o; wow. I assume you've also heard the "Ihanaa, Leijonat, ihanaa!" song that became popular after the last time Finland won the Championship? The commentator is legendary. It's going to be a real loss when he retires, I tell you.
...I'm... amazed at the topic of your discussion. It's so difficult. How long has this group of your been learning Finnish, anyway? How many people are there who even want to learn Finnish? O_o
Oh, I know how fun it can be to do something that is useful to plants but looks/sounds weird to onlookers. I once put a noose on a plant that grew like crazy. I didn't have sticks to support the stem, so I tied the noose so that the stem supported itself. I was quite happy with myself afterwards. XD Hope you continue to do (reasonably) well! ♥
XD
My teacher was always confident. She brought this plush lion to university afterwards and gave us cutouts of a famous young player to colour and stuff... ^^" Though I also think it's never too likely Finland wins, so... xP
Haven't heard this one, but I gotta check it out once I have finished my homework and well... feel overall better. Had a nice anxiety attack yesterday, once that put me in this state of indefinable fear, and now I am tired and sad as a result. How annoying. -_-" I need to get the work done, but I am hardly able to properly concentrate. Anyway, the commentator seems really enthusiastic and funny. XD
Well, we're one of the advanced courses. Not THAT advanced, but all of us have studied Finnish for more than a year, some have been ti Finland to study and everything... It was just about building easy sentences and our teacher told us all the words we needed to know. The girls/women in my course are really bitchy, though, and never want to actually TALK in Finnish and it is annoying the living hell out of me. -_-" Whenever the teacher comes up with a task like this they are all "But I caaan't and I don't know anything about the topic!", even if it is about their daily routine or something. Why are they even there, then?! It's like these girls in my Japanese course... We've been through the two easy syllable systems, Hiragana for Japanese words and Katakana for foreign words, and are now starting to learn our first Kanji, which ARE mean little nightmares. So we've been studying Japanese for more than half a year and like everyone has mastered Hiragana and Katakana, but there are STILL these few girls who start crying out when they have to read something in Katakana: "I cannot read this, I don't know any Katakana!" Then. Fucking. Study. It. I also do not get how they managed on of the systems, but refuse to get the other, even as it is a parallel and only the characters are different. It makes me so angry everytime I hear this, especially since the two worst offenders WANT to go to Japan for studying next year (I bet they won't, only two students a term are admitted for the scholarship and why would they pick them, who cannot even speak proper English? - One of the girls, by the way, is in for my ENGLISH MINOR and wants to become a teacher... <.<). Argh, I know I'm getting all ranty here, but people like this just annoy me. To get back to Finnish: I know it might not be easy and everything, but I simply hate the attitude. Instead of trying to come up with a few short sentences they rather sit down and say "I cannot speak so much Finnish, so I will not try". Learning by doing, anyone? *sigh*
There are a few people who wanna learn it, by the way. The beginner's courses are supposed to be overfull each term. Makes at least 20 and something for them and many stay for the advanced courses. A lot of people have already been to Finland or have Finnish relatives or even are from there but cannot speak the language (moved too soon to Germany). I, however, only learn for the fun of it. Which earned me a nice "I cannot understand this. o_o" from a girl whose mother is Finnish and who's been there often. That's just so weird - why does she study it when she thinks you cannot do so because you LIKE, but only when you are "forced"? Idiotic.
Hehe, noose around plant sounds nice to me, too. We managed to kill off most of the greenflies, there are only VERY few from time to time. *harhar* Too bad, now I don't have a target for spraying anymore. xP
My teacher was always confident. She brought this plush lion to university afterwards and gave us cutouts of a famous young player to colour and stuff... ^^" Though I also think it's never too likely Finland wins, so... xP
Haven't heard this one, but I gotta check it out once I have finished my homework and well... feel overall better. Had a nice anxiety attack yesterday, once that put me in this state of indefinable fear, and now I am tired and sad as a result. How annoying. -_-" I need to get the work done, but I am hardly able to properly concentrate. Anyway, the commentator seems really enthusiastic and funny. XD
Well, we're one of the advanced courses. Not THAT advanced, but all of us have studied Finnish for more than a year, some have been ti Finland to study and everything... It was just about building easy sentences and our teacher told us all the words we needed to know. The girls/women in my course are really bitchy, though, and never want to actually TALK in Finnish and it is annoying the living hell out of me. -_-" Whenever the teacher comes up with a task like this they are all "But I caaan't and I don't know anything about the topic!", even if it is about their daily routine or something. Why are they even there, then?! It's like these girls in my Japanese course... We've been through the two easy syllable systems, Hiragana for Japanese words and Katakana for foreign words, and are now starting to learn our first Kanji, which ARE mean little nightmares. So we've been studying Japanese for more than half a year and like everyone has mastered Hiragana and Katakana, but there are STILL these few girls who start crying out when they have to read something in Katakana: "I cannot read this, I don't know any Katakana!" Then. Fucking. Study. It. I also do not get how they managed on of the systems, but refuse to get the other, even as it is a parallel and only the characters are different. It makes me so angry everytime I hear this, especially since the two worst offenders WANT to go to Japan for studying next year (I bet they won't, only two students a term are admitted for the scholarship and why would they pick them, who cannot even speak proper English? - One of the girls, by the way, is in for my ENGLISH MINOR and wants to become a teacher... <.<). Argh, I know I'm getting all ranty here, but people like this just annoy me. To get back to Finnish: I know it might not be easy and everything, but I simply hate the attitude. Instead of trying to come up with a few short sentences they rather sit down and say "I cannot speak so much Finnish, so I will not try". Learning by doing, anyone? *sigh*
There are a few people who wanna learn it, by the way. The beginner's courses are supposed to be overfull each term. Makes at least 20 and something for them and many stay for the advanced courses. A lot of people have already been to Finland or have Finnish relatives or even are from there but cannot speak the language (moved too soon to Germany). I, however, only learn for the fun of it. Which earned me a nice "I cannot understand this. o_o" from a girl whose mother is Finnish and who's been there often. That's just so weird - why does she study it when she thinks you cannot do so because you LIKE, but only when you are "forced"? Idiotic.
Hehe, noose around plant sounds nice to me, too. We managed to kill off most of the greenflies, there are only VERY few from time to time. *harhar* Too bad, now I don't have a target for spraying anymore. xP